Ten ways to tell a perfect lie: First Way

Now I don't want to tell people they should lie .. however there are times when you have to must tell a lie. For example when your girlfriend comes without deodorant and gives you tight hug, despite how much you are repelled you have to tell her "You smell awful.. oops awesome today.. what are you wearing? " and she will smile on the perfect lie "Nothing love!!" and though you knew the answer.. just to make more numbers to get them cashed at some later stage in lie.. na Life.. you throw just another lie "Your body odor itself is perfume sweety pie" .. and voila.. you made the numbers!!!
Now coming back to original topic. As little background about lie a) It is not science nor an art. In fact it is mix of both. Art because you require so much of preparation and imagination, when suddenly it fails you never know.Science because there are rules and perfect conditions otherwise lie doesn't work. In case pressure on one's face is too much and color of the face is too red you will be easily caught. I will go into details in the second series of the topic. b) It is basic ingredient of the nature. Now as if I have kicked the hornets nest, you will accuse me saying dude nature don't lie. Perfect!! and you believe it don't you.. what will you call camouflage of an chameleon. Details again in IInd series of the topic.
Coming straight to first way of telling lie:Steps to follow:
a) Take a deep breath and relax
b) Remove any existing tensions from your body.. don't pray though.. although God doesn't kill you for lying but your face can change color
c) Repeat lie twice.. you are about to tell someone, believe with strong desire
d) Repeat the step c) two more times
e) Now go slowly towards the object to whom the lie has to be told
f) Don't change the emotional scale of your face
g) First look into the eyes of the object and then at his/her chin
h) Speak in normal tone the lie you practiced in step c)
i) In case object listen and doesn't respond.. assume you hit the nail
j) In case object counter question do step a and b immediately however start praying as well. Remember nobody can shot a deer in very first hunting. You need to practice it.
Try with small steps and small lies!!!
Though without example steps seldom makes sense, still I guarantee you I will give step by step example.. till then keep practicing First Way to tell lie... All the best!!!!
In case you are too scared with first step, I recommend just concentrate theory part, I will come to exact practical part in later lessons.